Although July did not have as much chaotic travel as June, it was still too much for one post. We were home most of the month, with the exception of one week I went to Boulder Colorado for a PD on the Mongols and a quick staycation for William’s birthday at a Disney resort. This month dragged a little; our days were full, but it felt like Will and I were in a constant treadmill of chores: piles of never ending laundry, the dishwasher or the sink perpetually full, more sticky messes of who knows what substances, the 2.5 year old pooping on the rug (only once!), millions of tiny Legos underfoot, what felt like all day buffet feasting by my children, and dirt everywhere.
Yes, where were smiles and laughs and dance parties and snuggles with books. But damn I have to also give voice to the minutia. It’s ok to complain and grumble but never forget the noble work of home; the precious task it is to love another human soul as formative and impressionable as children. Our society often neglects this interior work. We cannot calculate the economic value of it, therefore it is invisible and feels worthless. There are a few essays I have read over the years that help my mindset on this perpetual parental treadmill. However, this does mean I am some blissful mother, if you know me in real life you know that is so NOT me. I know this work is worth every ounce of effort I can give it!
- “the many orgasms of motherhood” by The Rewiled Life (and her book Rewilding Motherhood)
- JSTOR Blog “Why Care Matters More Than Work”
- Through a Glass Darkly “A People Without Hope” (it is behind a paywall but I still want to share it & quote her essay below)
- An ebook by Haley Stewart Burning Bright, Not Burning Out: Notes from a Decade of Surviving Motherhood (I print this out as a gift to all new moms)
Some people don’t take children to restaurants or on planes and vacations because they don’t have any to take; others because the prospect sounds too stressful or because they know their children’s presence will be seen as a burden to others.
And we are all poorer for that.
P.S. – although these are geared towards motherhood, fathers should read this stuff too. Their time is just as valuable (I write this as Will & the boys wash my car and I ignore laundry and the puzzle pieces of the floor to drink coffee and type). Ladies and gentlemen, it took me an hour to drink the coffee because of the children. It was no longer hot.
What We are Doing
It’ll probably be easier to provide a list of the things we did this month, otherwise it is a boring (yet stupidly long) narrative of playdates, sports, and life as a two-teacher household over summer.
- Monday through Thursday: swim lessons at 8:30 am for 2 weeks, Wednesdays 4pm tennis lessons, and Saturday mornings soccer lessons (all of this is for William; Ale was home with me or on nearby playgrounds during these events)
- July 1: William’s first time at the movies; they watched Minions & Monsters
- July 2: mom & William afternoon date at the Maitland Public Library Digging into Rhythm drum circle + ice cream
- July 3: pool + lunch playdate with one of William’s VPK friends (just William & I)
- Fourth of July pool party with friends
- July 6: pool playdate with the boy’s nanny + Lego building at the library
- July 7: we hosted a low key playdate for friends (3 moms + 5 kids)
- July 14: Kids Bowl Free at Oviedo Bowling with friends (only William & I)
- July 15: Library Summer Adventure session at our local library (the event was for 5+ so I stayed in the kiddie section with Ale and William went in on his own)
- July 13: Lego building at the library (this time with both boys & myself)
- July 17: Little Econ family nature walk + lunch playdate with another VPK friend
- July 20-24: William did a one-week summer camp at KidStrong while I was in Colorado to make things easier on Will solo-parenting
- July 23: Kindergarten Popsicle Social at the elementary school
- July 27: drive out to The Villages to visit Will’s aunt
- July 28: the boys went on another nature walk while I worked on setting up my classroom (I am moving rooms this year)
- July 29: water playdate + lunch with friends
- Plus: Will was doing a virtual program with UF via zoom 2 afternoons each week + he tutored via Zoom once a week
This looks hella exhausting and packed, it is; but you have to remember all four of us are home for the summer. In between all of this is plenty of time at home playing, family grocery trips, afternoon rainy day movies, naps, and running around in the backyard. So good, but by the end of the month I am ready to go back to work!
What We are Cooking
I love cooking for friends and now those friends include lots of little kids. I love having the house fill of kids running around, and yes that means dirty feet and sticky fingers in summer time. There is a set of wonderful essays in Around the Catholic Table on feeding other people’s children (basically don’t put in much effort in to it because who knows what they will eat) and if your house clean enough to host (the answer is yes!).
- Tik Tok “Viral Boursin Pasta (I had everything on hand and leftover buttered pasta from hosting friends); this was a side dish to accompany grilled sausages and roasted asparagus
- Pork Belly Tacos + defrosted leftover carnitas (that no one touched lol) + toppings: mango, cabbage slaw, avocado, queso blanco, shredded cheese, pickled red onions, and sliced baby peppers
- For my parents anniversary dinner: Barbecued Chicken (I baked it in the oven and it was one of my best!), Johnnycakes and Tomato Watermelon Salad (all from the Sweet Home Café Cookbook from the African American Smithsonian Museum I bought last year and have not used yet) + Quinoa Salad + Gingerbread Cake with Lemon Sauce from Around the Catholic Table (it was also breakfast the next day lol)
- Rosemary chicken salad (also from Around the Catholic Table) modified because I hate raisins/craisans/grapes in my chicken salad and added celery instead. Why have I never thought to serve chicken salad in pita bread! Nothing fell out, which was perfect because this was the “mom’s lunch” I served for a playdate. I made the kids PB&Js, which they hardly touched.
- I used this recipe just for vibes (I did a lot of my own thing) but I will certainly make a version of Sheet-pan Turkey Meatballs again! I served it with a loaf of bread, butter & ricotta and, because my parents popped in for dinner last minute, I added green olives, lupini beans, and cubed gouda cheese to add to the meal.
- Will made Pozole (he mashes together different recipes along with lots of tasting and adjusting)
- I also learned that you can microwave oregano in 15 second intervals to “dry it” & we made our own za’atar spice blend (based on the recipe from Sababa) & I then bought a spice grinder to make more spice blends and crush small-batch fresh spices
- I do not have time nor memory to enumerate the cocktails Will has been making but almost every night is a new (& delicious) creation!
What We are Reading/Watching/Listening To
I also did a lot of blabbing about reading in the rest of the post. Scroll up. Go read them. I finished Building the Benedict Option which is all about simple hospitality being a deeply Catholic (& purely human) trait we have allowed to slip away in this post-industrial world. I also started and finished What I Ate in One Year (and related thoughts) by Stanley Tucci (then watched the Devil Wears Prada 2 on the airplane to Colorado for his character). From the library I checked out Queen of Shadows by Sarah J. Maas and did the audiobook for The Assassin’s Blade (prequel novellas); devoured both in a week! While traveling to Colorado, I was working through two books that I finished the last week of July at home: 1. audiobook of Empire of the Dawn (last in a trilogy by Jay Kristoff) & a physical book Mistborn by Brandon Sanderson.
William has been super into crystals, gems, and minerals (not in a New Age way, but in a nerdy geology way). So we picked up a few books from the library to break up the monotony of reading from his field guide identification book of rocks and minerals (mind-numbingly boring!). And Ale is all about the train books (Thomas the Tank Engine and The Little Engine that Could). Although I don’t think it counts as reading, we have discovered we own an I Spy board book and they’ve been loving it (note to self, get some more for Christmas!).
On a whim Will put on Project Hail Mary the night before we were leaving for William’s birthday Disney trip. We had no intentions of actually sitting down to watch it in its entirety but within 5 minutes we knew we had to finish it. I am not a fan of space/existential threat movies but this was excellent! Otherwise, I didn’t watch much else beyond a bit of Rings of Power and Good Omens (both great for folding laundry after the boys go to bed because that is when I watch TV). The boys watched a few movies this month: The Muppets Movie, Emperor’s New Groove, The Princess and the Frog, Thomas & Friends: The Great Race, and Paw Patrol: The Mighty Movie.
JMF
